[S] Bloodhunt

[MaxVertigo]

Well the wait might take a day or two. I'll start traveling to Shanghai on Friday, so I might write some stuff up on the flight. The character of Douglas is the gear-head of the team. Also The Huntress, is one impressive machine, I've already envisioned a whole Mad Max, Road Warrior scene in which they take Adam and Miloslav head on with the Durango. I've pretty much posted up to page 45 of the script, which means it's the end of part 1 of the pilot.

I've got two more scripts here for other show ideas, I don't know if you all want to read them. If you do I'd gladly post them

[The stig]

I liked this installment, i felt that douglas was hit harder than the rest of them.

I'm interested to see what the others can do, i mean, joseph has these dog ears, which in effect, you want to knwo more about that, but it sets up the chance for you to give douglas and manuel some nifty little power, like speed, or sense of smell or something.

Good installment.

[MaxVertigo]

Aside from Joseph, the rest of the gang is pretty normal. That's pretty much what attracts me about the characters, I've read in many places that not a whole lot of mortal people could fight supernatural creatures. Dracula was a great example about how the greatest mind (Van Helsing) could defeat evil. In Buffy we had Xander Harris, who prevented the apocalypse with out any super powers. In my story we have the hunters, the story goes that they were knights and peasants that decided to stand up against the constant terrorism that Werewolves brought to their lands. The knights taught the peasants how to fight, in exchange for having the peasants forge silver weapons. Only a select few would survive the coming battles, but with every new generation new hunters came. Weapons changed, but the traditions did not.

Still there is a slight chance that one of the members will soon earn power beyond their imagination, and might eventually fall into darkness. Still only through darkness can one find light.

[The stig]

knights and peasants that decided to stand up against the constant terrorism that Werewolves brought to their lands. The knights taught the peasants how to fight, in exchange for having the peasants forge silver weapons. Only a select few would survive the coming battles, but with every new generation new hunters came. Weapons changed, but the traditions did not.

Add a bit more a of a start and that would be a perfect prologue.

[MaxVertigo]

Well after 16 hours of plane hopping I'm finally in Shanghai, unfortunately there will still be a slight delay on part 8. Why? Mostly because it is an unpolished version, so it needs to go through some rewrites and what not. However, part 8 will two times bigger than the rest of the parts, with no holds barred action, and of course great character development.

Also stig, I've got plans on writing "flashback" episodes of some sort, which would portray those dark times I so giddily write about.

[SL.x]

Take your time man... It's always important to have a good rewriting session and to feel good about what you post. I usually read over my stuff three times, the third one actually being out loud. I can't wait for that because it seems that the intro and more of a pilot sensation is worn off and we're ready for the first major showdown where as the first two were more of a set up and intro. Flashbacks are frequently used in such type of series which is a great way to deliver more info and make the story even more exciting for the viewer (in this case reader ) (ie Lost, also Flashforwards 8) ) but sometimes I see it misused, like the writer useus the flashback as too much of a crutch to advance the story. I will enjoy reading it either way, but I just wanted to give my two cents here . Once again, can't wait.

[MaxVertigo]

Here's the long awaited 8th part of the first episode. I love what I've written here, which is my first big action sequence.

EXT. FOREST CABIN- DAY

The Durango is parked outside of the Cabin. Eric, and the rest of the boys: Joseph, Manuel and Douglas walk towards the cabin. Dried leaves and twigs, crunching and snapping with their every step.

Douglas, gets a good look at the cabin and smirks.

DOUGLAS
This place hasn't changed one bit.


MANUEL
What can I say, I'm an old fashioned guy.


JOSEPH
Or you're just to lazy to rebuild it.

Nice burn by Joseph, but Manuel sets it aside.He expected these remarks to come from someone like Joseph. After all he knows him quite well.

They walk up to the door, and are surprised when they see a "Office closed. We'll be back later sign" hanging on it. Joseph can't help but make fun of this.

JOSEPH
(pointing at the sign)
Looks like somebody ditched ya.

MANUEL
(calm and cool)
What time is it?

JOSEPH
15 past two.

MANUEL
Ralph's on his lunch break then. Which gives us about...ten minutes.

Manuel, pulls out the keys to the cabin from his pocket. They hang from a rabbit's foot. He places the key into the lock, and unlocks it. He swings the door open.

Joseph, walks in first followed by Eric and Douglas. Manuel, always the gentleman walks in last.

INT. FOREST CABIN- DAY

Joseph, the first one to walk into the office takes it all in. It's been a long time since he set foot here. Somehow he is in awe with the place. It holds a special place in his heart after all.

Douglas, Eric and Manuel follow. They're not as in awe as Joseph. They just want to get it, take their shit, and get out.

Manuel, proceeds to shuffle through his keys, as he makes way towards a metal closet. It is a greenish blue hue, not very pretty. He unlocks the MASTER LOCK, and opens the closet's doors. They screech, for they haven't been opened in years.

ANGLE ON- INTERIOR OF METAL CLOSET

The closet is riddled with boxes of ammunition, silver bullets to be exact. Five shotguns also hang inside the closet. They are gorgeous Winchester model shotguns. One of the shotguns is a sawed-off.

Eric reaches in and pulls out the sawed-off. He cocks it, and checks to see if it needs adjusting. He knows what he's doing. He's a virtuoso with these sort of things. He then begins throwing questions at Manuel. They both look like machines, spouting out prerecorded lines.

ERIC
Concentration?


MANUEL
25% Percent.

ERIC
Killing shot?

MANUEL
I'd go with the headshot.

ERIC
I'd go with the headshot too.

Eric pulls out another shotgun from the rack, and tosses it at Manuel. He then proceeds to toss him a box of bullet casings.

ERIC (CONT'D)
You still remember how to shoot that thing right?

MANUEL
Took a shot at a couple a beer cans every weekend, nothing special. Still, old habits die hard.


ERIC
(as he loads the gun)
Indeed they do.

Douglas reaches for his gun, it's got a custom made stock. The stock, holds five silver bullet casings. It's bigger than the rest of the shotguns, but that does not mean it is stronger.

He pops the barrel open, and checks to see if it is loaded. He then snaps it back shut. He then tosses Joseph his shotgun. Joseph catches it.

JOSEPH
Feels nice to hold one of these again.

He shuts one of his eyes and aims towards an unspecific target. He's just fooling around with the gun, like a little boy.

He then stops. He's heard something.

JOSEPH (CONT'D)
Someone's coming.

They all remain quiet. The door creaks as it begins to open. Sunlight entering through the small crevice as it grows larger and larger. The door finally opens and in walks Ralph. He's carrying fast food bags, from the local cheese burger joint.

RALPH
Hey Manuel, I brought some chow. I ho-

As soon as he steps into the waiting room, he is greeted by the barrel of a shotgun. Eric, out of reflex and instinct is pointing the gun at him.

Ralph (cont'd)
(Shocked at seeing a gun pointed to his face)
Woah!

Eric, slowly brings his gun down. An annoyed look on his face. Their secret has been blown.

Ralph is greeted by the image of Manuel, and the rest of his friends all holding shotguns. He doesn't take it all in quite well.

RALPH
(panicking)
The hell you guys got guns for?


MANUEL
(trying to calm him down)
There's a bear causing a ruckus up in the camping area-


RALPH
There aint no bear in the camping area! The hell you trying to cover up? Are you guys some sort of criminal gang, moonlighting as common folk.


JOSEPH
(to himself in a sarcastic tone)
Actually we're everything but.

Manuel, looks at Joseph giving him a "you're not helping" stare.

ERIC
I don't have time for this.

He grabs Ralph by the shoulder and shoves him out the door. The bags of food falling onto the ground. Eric then turns to look at Manuel.

ERIC (CONT'D)
The kid's coming with us, he can use my old gun.

Manuel nods, and reaches for the spare gun. Eric walks out of the door. In the background Joseph reaches down, and picks up a cheeseburger from the squished bag. He hides it in his jacket pocket. Douglas walks past him.

Joseph shoves a couple of fries into his mouth. He then looks up and sees, Douglas walk out the door.

JOSEPH
(mouth full of fries)
The hell are we going?

cut to:

INT. BAR- DAY

It's a small bar. The kind of bar where the bad kind of people would frequent. It is old and quite rustic. The greenish paint on the walls, chipping off.

A man flies through the air, in slow motion. His chest riddled with bullet holes. He's been shot, with silver bullets none the less.

As the man or better put werewolf flies through the air, others rush for cover.

This is a werewolf bar, and it is being raided. Raided by the hunters.

Eric kicks the door open, shotgun in hand. He cocks the shotgun, as the casings pop out. He rapidly reloads, and proceeds to shoot at the furniture. Many werewolves manage to flee through the back door. The ones that try their best to attack them, are shot down by either Douglas, Manuel or Joseph. Ralph simply looks in horror/awe at all this. He simply does not believe his eyes. This feels like something out of a dream.

Glass is heard breaking and, Eric rapidly turns towards the origin of the sound. Like a black ops soldier would. He slowly walks towards the source of the sound. Slowly making his way towards the bar.

After taking a couple of steps, the glass and rubble breaking under his boots, he finally reaches the bar. He looks behind the counter, gun always at the ready.

A man lies on the ground behind the counter, his body curled up into a ball, his arms over his head. He looks as if he were trying to shield himself from an earthquake. Like a baby or a small child would. This is JOCK, the proprietor of the bar, and also a werewolf. He's a snitch as well, and dedicates his life to the selling of information.

ERIC
Sorry about the mess Jock. I'm pretty sure you'll have it fixed in no time.

He mocks Jock with his words, like a soldier would mock his enemy.

Jock stretches out his arm and picks up a whiskey bottle. He throws it at Eric. Eric dodges it.

Jock
Screw you!

Eric pulls up his shotgun and cocks it. He points it at Jock.

ERIC
You going to calm down any time soon Jock? I said are you going to calm down?!

Jock begins reaching towards another bottle. BANG! The bottle shatters, the alcohol splashing everywhere. Jock screams in fear.

Eric cocks the gun, the bullet casings popping out. He reloads and continues to fire.

Jock, squirms in fear. The glass bottles exploding into tiny pieces of glass, that fly everywhere. Alcohol soaking everything up.

Ralph reacts to all of this, quickly lashing out at Eric.

RALPH
What the hell is wrong with you?!

Eric turns to look at Manuel. His face completely changed, like a soldier's lost in the carnage of war.

ERIC
Manuel, take the kid outside!

Manuel looks in disbelief, Eric is no longer the man he used to be. However Manuel does what he's told, and takes Ralph outside.

Joseph and Douglas remain inside the bar, however their expressions have now changed. No longer are they those of immediate satisfaction, but of horror. Their friend is long gone. A new Eric stands before them.

ERIC
You going to come out anytime soon Jock? 'Cause I can do this all day.

Jock finally decides to stand up, his shirt soaked with alcohol. He is a bearded 29 year old, eyes blue as a river.

JOCK
The hell do you want?

He speaks with a slight hint of disgust. He hates Eric, he hates him with all his heart.

ERIC
Information.

Eric pulls out a picture from his pocket. Places it on the bar and slides it towards Jock.

ERIC (CONT'D)
On this man.

Jock picks up the photograph.

ANGLE ON- PHOTOGRAPH

It is a candid photo of Valentin standing outside his garage smoking a cigarette or something.

JOCK
Valentin Menshov, Russian-

Eric slams his fist onto the bar. A loud bang.

ERIC
His location goddammit!

Jock simply stares up at Eric. Annoyance in his eyes.

JOCK
Rumor says he's here, in Vancouver...to kill you. Just like he did your brother.

Eric does not lose his cool. He is not afraid to die.

ERIC
Where is he?

JOCK
He's staying at an apartment complex downtown. The place's a real dump. I'll write the address down for ya.

Jock reaches out for a napkin, Eric drops a pen on the bar. It's line with silver. Jock notices this, but picks it up either way.

Jock begins writing down the address on the napkin. He then slides it towards Eric. He tries to hand him back his pen, but Eric refuses.

ERIC
Keep it.

Jock smirks, he takes the insult with pride. Eric then turns around and proceeds to leave.

JOCK
(as Eric is leaving)
Tonight's the night you die Eric! Be prepared to meet your brother in hell. Be prepared to scream like a little bitch. Just like your brother did.

Eric pauses. He tightly grip his shotgun. The desire to turn around and pull the trigger, courses through his veins. He ponders if he should take the high road and let Jock live. He does. He continues walking.

Jock, sighs in relief. He thought he would be a dead man after saying that. A couple of seconds later the remaining whiskey bottle explodes. The echo of the gunshot ringing throughout the bar. Jock screams like a little girl. Like a little bitch.

cut to:

ext. Bar- night

Eric walks out the door, smoking shotgun in hand. Manuel and Ralph and the rest of the gang waiting for him. Joseph and Douglas have badasses written all over them. Manuel has doubt in his eyes, he no longer considers Eric the same man. Ralph, is somehow frightened by what he has just lived through.

Eric turns to look at them, and continues walking towards the Durango.

ERIC
We still got work to do boys.

Ralph reacts to this.

RALPH
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! We aren't going anywhere. Not until you tell me what the hell is going on?

Eric turns around and sizes up Ralph. Young, and innocent. Not exactly cut out to be a hunter.

ERIC
You aint nobody to boss me around kid. You want the truth, I'll spin it for you quick. The "no nonsense" version. Let's say that since the day you were born, your mother and father tucked you in bed at night, and told you that the world was full of pastel colors and butterflies. That was a lie.The world aint nice, and it sure as hell aint fair. Deep down to it's core the world we live in is a dark, dark place.

This story seems to bring out the damage in Eric. A worn out look begins to appear on his face.

ERIC (CONT'D)
Now you see I had a brother, Derek. He taught me everything, he showed me the world. The real world. And in that world there were things, that only in my nightmares I had seen. Werewolves.


RALPH
You got to be shi-


ERIC
It's the truth. You don't believe me, take a good look inside of that bar. All those bodies, all those innocent looking people, are merely vessels of what they once were. They're nothing but beasts now. Violent, primal beasts. My job, our job is to hunt them down, and take them out before they can do more harm. Now I aint forcing you to join us, that's your decision. You want to turn around, and pretend all of this was simply a bad day in the life of the after school worker, then it's fine by me.Or, you could grow a pair, and help us save the world.

Eric turns around, Joseph and Douglas follow him towards the car. Manuel stays, he looks at Ralph, who somehow still seems to be processing all of this information. Manuel walks past him, and pats him on the shoulder.

Eric, Douglas, and Joseph begin getting into the van in their usual seats. Douglas always in the drivers seat. Manuel opens the door and begins getting in. He shuts it behind him.

The engine of the Durango roars loudly as it comes to life. Ralph, stands still. Manuel staring at him through the passenger window.

The Durango begins to drive forward, leaving Ralph further and further behind.

int./ext. Dodge Durango- dusk

Eric sits in the back seat, shotgun beside him, the barrel pointing upwards for safety. His face locked into a serious expression, a dead expression. Like batman.

He then hears something that brings a smile to his face.

RALPH (o.s)
Wait! Wait!

[The stig]

Well, this was a good installment.

This one bit,

Eric pulls up his shotgun and cocks it. He points it at Jock.

, remineded me of men in black lol. Where K always pulled out the gun at that alien who could grow his head back xD

As for jock, can you kill him? Lol, i don't like snitches haha, J/K, he'd be a good characteer to keep around, for a while.

And his name, is it meant to be french?

If so, then i think you mean...

Jacque or Jacques.

This ralph seems to be an ordinary person, so he's a good adition to this, he brings abit more humanity back into the story.

Though i'm curious as to why the sound of him saying wait made Eric smile.

Keep it coming.

[MaxVertigo]

Jock, is more like "Jock". lol. It's a nickname, but now that you mention it I might make his real name Jacque.

Ralph is supposed to bring the outsiders POV to this world, a fresh pair of eyes finally receiving the darkness. The fact that Eric smiles when Ralph says "wait" will be played out later on. Eric likes the kid, he sees himself in him.

Part 9 will be coming next week, since I don't have any classes then.

[SL.x]

Long time no see.... Good installment, a good action sequence. I really like the new addition, it's sort of an often used situation where there is that unspoilled innosence that gets brought in and serves perhaps as a common concience, but I am not sure if that's where you are going with this. Other than that, it was quite spot on... Can't wait for more...

[MaxVertigo]

Here is part 9. It is rather small, but I enjoyed writing this part. It gives a lot more character depth to Miloslav and Abram. Miloslav actually gets his turn to shine, with a sort of Shakespearean monologue.

INT. APARTMENT ROOM- night

The dirty and humid apartment room is filled with the loud screams of a woman. She screams out in pain.

Abram's head comes up into frame, his mouth covered in blood. Pleasure in his eyes. He is feeding. The screams have stopped.

Miloslav walks into the room, and finds Abram standing before the dead corpse of a beautiful blond teenager. The dead body is slumped against the couch. The body is a bloody mess, scratches and teeth marks all around, it's a miracle that it's guts haven't been spilled yet.

Abram's clothes are wet and dirty with blood, little stains here and there. Dry cleaning won't get those out.

Miloslav says nothing.

ABRAM
(speaking in Russian)
Just a little bit of fast food for the road. You want some?

Miloslav looks at the body, then back at Abram. He simply spits at the ground, and walks away.

Abram follows. He wipes his mouth his jacket sleeve, smudging blood across his cheeks.

ABRAM (cont'd)
(speaking in Russian)
Where the hell have you been all day anyways?

MILOSLAV
(speaking in Russian)
Out and about, the rest is none of your business.

Abram, smiles. He knows Miloslav better than anyone.

ABRAM
(speaking in Russian)
Alright.

MILOSLAV
(speaking in Russian)
Valentin call?

ABRAM
(speaking in Russian)
Not yet.

MILOSLAV
(speaking in Russian)
Somethings wrong then.

ABRAM
(speaking in Russian)
Relax will ya. Valentin will come through. Before you know it we'll be laughing about all this.

Miloslav pulls out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket, pulls one out, places it in his mouth and lights it up.

MILOSLAV
(speaking in Russian)
You're not getting it are you?

ABRAM
(speaking in Russian)
Getting what?

Miloslav walks towards the window. He exhales smoke.

MILOSLAV
(speaking in Russian)
That feeling in the back of your neck. The monotone voice, that mockingly speaks inside of your head.

ABRAM
(speaking in Russian)
My conscience? Miloslav, we don't have-

MILOSLAV
(speaking in Russian)
We do Abram, we just tend to ignore it from time to time. It's always there, lingering within our minds.

As Miloslav speaks the girl that Abram was feeding on slightly opens her eyes. It appears she is still alive.

MILOSLAV (cont'd)
(speaking in Russian)
What are we Abram? Are we a man that pretends to be an animal? Or an animal that believes he is a man?

ABRAM
(speaking in Russian)
We're Werewolves Miloslav, it's not that complicated.

MILOSLAV
(speaking in Russian)
But it is Abram.

Another puff from the cigarette. The girl slumps to the ground, her body thuds as she hits the floor. Milsolav and Abram ignore the noise.

MILOSLAV (CONT'D)
(speaking in Russian)
We kill to survive, but in doing so we take innocent life. Are we truly that superior, that in order to survive we must deny another species to live and enjoy the miracle of life?

ABRAM
(speaking in Russian)
Have you been drinking?

MILOSLAV
(speaking in Russian)
That's not the point.

The girl, starts to make her way towards the door. She crawls on the floor, all her strength placed into clawing her way forward. She leaves a blood trail behind.Her breathing is sort of weird, for she is missing a big chunk of her neck.

Miloslav quickly make sher way towards her. He grabs her and pins her to the floor. She tries her best to scream, but she can't. Her voice does not work.

Miloslav turns to look at Abram. They say nothing. Miloslav arcs his head backwards, and mid-shifts into a wolf-man form, he then comes down on the poor girl and finishes her off.

He pulls his head up and shifts back to his human form.

MILOSLAV
(speaking in Russian)
We kill them, they kill us. It's the way of the world. The question is, will we go down fighting?

[The stig]

I liked this part.

Miloslav is an interesting character and i don't knwo why, but i see a twisting future for him.

Like a sort of "What the F*** is going on with this guy? Is he them, is he us, what?!".

Lol, i hope you don't kill him off quickly as you can do alot with his character.